FACT: Total asphyxiations attributed to rice cake eating since 1965: 1,601.
– FINAL EXITS by Michael Largo
FACT: 99% of all "mazes" can be solved if you walk to the right every time you have to choose between left and right.
FACT: Non-dairy creamer is flammable.
FACT: More people are killed annually by donkeys than die in air crashes.
FACT: One of the largest carriers of hepatitis B is dinner mints.
FACT: In 2003, 24 people died from inhaling popcorn fumes.
– FINAL EXITS by Michael Largo
FACT: Deaths attributed to “loud sounds” since 1970: 34,831.
- FINAL EXITS by Michael Largo
FACT: A group of unicorns is called a blessing.
FACT: Poets have a life span fifteen years below average.
– FINAL EXITS by Michael Largo
FACT: Since 2001, 987 children have been killed while buying ice cream.
– FINAL EXITS by Michael Largo
FACT: Nutmeg is extremely poisonous if injected intravenously.
FACT: Halogen floor lamps caused approximately 270 fires and 19 deaths per year.
– FINAL EXITS by Michael Largo
FACT: Three people die each year testing if a 9V battery works on their tongue.
Survival poem #17 by Marty McConnell
because this is what you do. get up.
blame the liquor for the heaviness. call in late
to work. go to the couch because the bed
is too empty. watch people scream about love
on Jerry Springer. count the ways
it could be worse. it could be last week
when the missing got so big
you wrote him a letter
and sent it. it could be yesterday, no work
to go to, whole day looming.
it could be last month
or the month before, when you still
thought maybe. still carried plans
around with you like talismans.
you could have kissed him last night.
could have gone home with him, given in,
cried after, softly, face to the wall, his heavy arm
around you, hand on your stomach, rubbing.
shower. remember your body. water
hotter than you can stand. sit
on the shower floor. the word
devastated ringing the tub. buildings
collapsed into themselves. ribs
caving toward the spine. recite
the strongest poem you know. a spell
against the lonely that gets you
in crowds and on three hours’ sleep.
wonder where the gods are now.
get up. because death is not
an alternative. because this is what you do.
air like soup, move. door, hallway, room.
pants, socks, shoes. sweater. coat. cold.
wish you were a bird. remember you
are not you, now. you are you
a year from now. how does that
woman walk? she is not sick or sad.
doesn’t even remember today.
has been to Europe. what song
is she humming? now. right now.
that’s it.
Marty McConell’s website: http://www.martyoutloud.com/
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