FACT: 99% of all "mazes" can be solved if you walk to the right every time you have to choose between left and right.

FACT: Total asphyxiations attributed to rice cake eating since 1965: 1,601.
– FINAL EXITS by Michael Largo

FACT: Poets have a life span fifteen years below average.
– FINAL EXITS by Michael Largo

FACT: More people are killed annually by donkeys than die in air crashes.

FACT: One of the largest carriers of hepatitis B is dinner mints.

FACT: Deaths attributed to “loud sounds” since 1970: 34,831.
- FINAL EXITS by Michael Largo

FACT: Non-dairy creamer is flammable.

FACT: Nutmeg is extremely poisonous if injected intravenously.

FACT: A group of unicorns is called a blessing.

FACT: Three people die each year testing if a 9V battery works on their tongue.

FACT: In 2003, 24 people died from inhaling popcorn fumes.
– FINAL EXITS by Michael Largo

FACT: Halogen floor lamps caused approximately 270 fires and 19 deaths per year.
– FINAL EXITS by Michael Largo

FACT: Since 2001, 987 children have been killed while buying ice cream.
– FINAL EXITS by Michael Largo

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Audio

True Stories

Audio

I do this performance series with some friends called True Stories at Mississippi Studios here in Portland, about once a quarter. It’s pretty friggin’ fun. If you happen to be in town. This is me telling a story that you shouldn’t listen to at work.

Harrogate Crime Writing Festival Interview

Audio

This interview was conducted at the Harrogate Crime Festival, in Harrogate, England. I think I was out drinking until 4 a.m. the night before.

NPR Interview

Audio

For the record, Ketzel Levine was never in any actual danger during this interview. I’m sure if she’d actually lost consciousness, I could have gotten help in time to save her.